invasion!

So, I am just waking up and cleaning up from the aftermath of last night's after-bar invasion, in which about a dozen super-sloshed pseudo-hipsters crashed my after-bar C.C. Club dance party. I mean, seriously! I felt so violated. This was when it was still pseudo-fun--you can barely make out the latent homosexuals in the background in their horizontally-striped sweaters and plastic bottles of Canadian Club and their pseudo-facial hair and their halter-top wearing beards who drank all of my Grey Goose mixed with marachino cherry juice out of coffee cups! Coffee cups! These kids didn't even know who the Dead Milkmen were!

The gang was headed up by this secretary from Connecticut named Purnima or something multicultural like that.

Out of the whole group there was only one I would have liked, blown or something.

What I love about the above photo, despite it being grainy and taken by me, uber-sloshed and unable to figure out how to turn on the flash on my camera whilst maintaining upright, is how you can make out my friend Jessica in the center of the photo. The girl has got a sixth-sense for cameras pointed at her and she's always got a pose and flashing those beautiful white teeth.

I should note that Jessica is the only one of my friends, save Tony, who stayed around to help me control the crowd, all of whom totally wanted to have pseudo-sex on my bed, ON TOP of my new laptop and my new 250 gigabyte external hard drive.

I finally got them all to leave by announcing, loudly, "My boyfriend is on his way over here and he needs me to FUCK him HARD!" That did it.

The C.C. Club is officially over.